Author Topic: Let's play Blood Bowl 2  (Read 17659 times)

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Offline Mika

  • 28
Click here to see Black Dynamite's level up
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That's a normal roll, so he gets something useful (no Mighty Blow this time)
It's gonna be Guard!

Click here to see Scotty's level up
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He rolls 11! Ooooh, that's a tough one! More agile Blitzer (so that he could pick up the ball and escape tackle zones more reliably) with AG+, or do we settle for something else?

No, the opposition shall fear you piling on them!

This is the current HLPBowlers roster

Our most expensive players are Mammothtank and Swashmebuckle, with Scotty and Srihag trailing behind
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
Today we are mostly punching elves

HLPBowlers vs Vicious Hydras (Dark Elves), Game 21, First quarter (turns 1-4), In the name of turnovers...

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Vicious Hydras eh? Well, they do have two witch elves and an assassin, so perhaps the team name refers to that?

We are seeing some inducements against us, Eldril Sidewinder and an extra re-roll. Could be worse.

To refresh your memory, Eldril is the dude who looks like this

And as usual, against elves, we kick the ball

The defensive formation against dark elves is again employed. You just gotta be on the lookout for those frenzied witch elves

We kick

To see that the weather will remain nice. Nice.

The elves advance, and one of their first actual actions against us is a stab. That pesky assassin is gunna get it if he keeps on poking Black Dynamite like that.

The witch elf fails the pickup on their score line, and it gets re-rolled. Successfully. Lucky for us, she lacks movement to bring the ball closer.

Then we see their blitz

Which takes down Scotty. Get your ass back on the line Orc!

Then there's an attempted escape from Blackbelt Jones. It gets tackled.


Our turn #1

Seems quite good at the moment

Left flank, advance and get into contact with those elves. You too Spoon!

He actually does that. Mad Max follows in Spoon's trail, enjoying the guarded area the troll provides.

Black Knight also advances to get into contact with right flank. Uncommonly, it's Swashmebuckle who delivers our blitz this turn

This being a true "Yikes! And away" blitz, Swashmebuckle then does a tactical retreat to the middle of the pitch.

And Srihag takes his place as a guardian of the right flank

Trak moves in to assist, and Black Dynamite blocks



Black Dynamite blocks!

Well that was a re-roll well-spent!

Our first turn looks like this

Elf turn #2

There's the breakthrough attempt...

whch, thanks to Scotty, remains an attempt

No re-roll!


Our turn #2

The dynamic duo Scotty and Srihag gather around this hapless elf. You know what happens with this setup don't you?



It's a stun

Swashmebuckle fills in a gap on the left hand side, and Trak gets close to the right hand witch elf. Then it's time for Scourge to start blocking

Mad Max takes down this massively mobile line elf

And Spoon, well, you know...

Well at least he took the elf with him


Elf turn #3

They start their turn with half of their players prone. Well done, I'm proud of you boyz!

They naturally stand up.

This one die blitz got Srihag, that blitzer had tackle, so unusually, Srihag's dodge doesn't help

Eldril side winds his way to our scoring range. We probably gotta do something about this guy.

The ball comes closer, it is inside our blitzing range!

The elf turn is ended with a failed dodge from Black Dynamite


Our turn #3

Naturally, we take first care of the ball. Everything else is secondary

Swashmebuckle goes to annoy Eldril. This is a safe move so it's OK.

Black Knight blitzes

And ah-ha! The witch doesn't have wrestle or block, so we take both down which means that the witch goes down.

He moves in to sandwich the ball next to the pitch

Scotty blocks this elf blitzer, but being as skilled as the blitzer is, it's just a push. Scotty moves up.

Srihag: "Scotty did WAT??!!!"

Here's a clean block from the center of the pitch, delivered by Mad Max

Blackbelt delivers too

And Scourge pushes this elf towards the left border line. Mammoth moves in to guard the position Scourge left open.

Trak runs to block the Southern access to the ball

He makes it without dodge. Unusual, it's has a mere 67 % probability of success which tends to mean a turnover.

That's our turn #3. Ain't gonna be easy to steal that ball!

Elf turn #4

The blitzed witch stands up, but remains on her position.

This is the point where Eldril realized that Srihag was alone next to the pitch border. It's a blitz!

Srihag: "I hate you Scotty!"

Ah, I do believe we are going to apo this one.

That strain was apparently a misdiagnosis, and Srihag will be able to join our drive after a break.

Being outnumbered, Scotty is now an easy block. He goes down. The thing is, Srihag and Scotty have prevented the opposition from sending players towards the ball. I.e. both of them were doing their job by tying up opposition players. As does Swashmebuckle.

And here's a runner too

That's the end of their #4 turn.

We start by getting rid of the witch. Black Dynamite takes Defender Stumbles (POW + !), and since the witch has dodge, this is a push. But she's pushed in front of Black Knight.

So nobody is surprised when Black Knight continues the block by punching her out to the crowd

She will play again, but won't be pestering us anymore in this game oh no.

Spoon moves to assist and generally to be an annoyance. After this it's blocking time!

Blackbelt scores a perfect hit on this fella. Where's your dodge now, pal?  :lol:

Since the side line blitzer escaped Scourge, he re-acquires that player

Mammoth blitzes the guys with speedy legs (and nothing else)

Yes, you can jump on him!

Mad Max shifts to the right hand side as we are starting to run out of elves to punch in the middle. He takes even one go for it to close the access to Trak

Swashmebuckle, demonstrate your dodge ability to the elves. They are not the only ones who can do that!

Trak, pick it up!

No no no no, I said PICK IT UP!


That's the end of our turn #4.

Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Vicious Hydras (Dark Elves), Game 21, Second Quarter (Turns 5-8)

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The elves seem to be interested of the ball for the first time in two turns.

Of course, they could not pass up the opportunity of smacking Swashmebuckle down.

Nope, Swashmebuckle is a slippery eel, and that doesn't affect him.

They re-roll??!!

Well whatever  :lol:

A blitzer contacts Mad Max

And of course, we get the obligatory dodge away from Scourge. He really tends to scare the opposition!

Our turn #5

The ball must advance. Otherwise, there's no Bowl in Blood Bowl. Only Blood. Black Knight blitzes the roadblock away.

And advances!

As do the rest Dynamite and Trak.

Well, that's about the important stuff done. I guess there's nothing else this turn but smacking the opposition. Good.
Blackbelt brings the pain

Correction, he took away all the pain

Permanently even. With this lucky block that separated the jaw bone from the skull, he also levels up!

Scourge pursues the opposition relentlessly

Scourge: "Ya can run but ya cannae hide"

And Mad Max causes a turnover right here


Elf turn #6

They finally got the point that the ball is lost and advancing towards their half, not ours  :lol:

Eldril gazes Mammoth, and it doesn't take long until Mammoth is gone

"Trussssst in me, jussssst in me!"

Swashmebuckle absorbs the blitz action this turn

But it's just a stun

Mad Max's target blitzer takes advantage of the gap in our lines, and runs away

Uh, Scotty was apparently there as well

It's a re-roll!

I don't like the way they are bunching up around Mammothtank

Our turn #6

Mad Max runs to assist

Scourge takes care of his half of the pitch

"You ain't runnin' away from me humie!"

Black Knight punches the attaching type away towards Black Dynamite

Who then blocks too

Not particularly impressive. Because of this we cannot advance the cage. On the other hand, the thing is, the cage doesn't need to move any further.

Blackbelt circles around his new prey

Spoon, I know you are alone, but could you please move to support our guys bunched up just there?

Spoon!  :mad: :hopping:  :banghead:

Well, we take what we can, and Scotty starts blocking. We don't have re-rolls

Mammothtank takes a one die block here

That's certainly useful!

Our turn #6 ends in a side line cage on the right border, and a big cluster fu... fumble next to it

Elf turn #7

Ah yes, please do go next to the troll!

Oh, Eldril could easily take out one cage player by hypnotizing him. Dangit!

Then they clear the way by knocking Mad Max down

The witch elf blocks Scotty

She's frenzied, so there's more where it came from

But that was not too impressive either.

Our turn #7

Swashmebuckle can finally join back to the game! Yay!

C'mon boyz, take that witch down!
Block 1 (Mammoth)

Block 2 (Blackbelt)

Block 3 (Spoon)

... you got lucky this time!

Black Dynamite wakes up from the hypnosis and pushes Eldril away

Block 4 (Scotty)

Nope. She ain't going down today. That's our turn #7.

Elf turn #8

That's Mad Max or Mammoth getting hypnotized. That Eldril is really trying my patience

Then there's the last ditch effort to blitz Trak

It's of course just a push.

Then we get our own Col. Runaway here.

That's it.

Our turn #8.

Swashmebuckle runs closer to where da action is

I'm sure he doesn't get singled out after been lying prone next to half of the period...

Now, there was a blitzer who was getting too close to our ball carrier. Black Dynamite, you go first!

Good. Now Trak is free to score. However, I'm sort of the opinion that we should respect Scourge's attempts to keep the opposition blitzer at bay for the whole half. He gets to blitz him!

Crowd surfing is fun, but this time the elven armor holds

Scourge: "Next time Gadget, next time!"

We don't take further risks in trying to hurt opposition. That one score is more important, so Trak runs it in

Yeah, do the gorilla!

Oh, and it's half time!

Well, there's still an attrition rate

Good work boyz!

Their KOd dudes get back. Unfortunate, but that's life

Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Vicious Hydras (Dark Elves), Game 21, Third quarter (Turns 9-12)

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We start with more spread offensive formation, witch elves be damned. The probability they roll blitz is small enough that it's a risk I'm willing to take.

And that probability remained low. We get an extra re-roll, which is always nice.

Well, the ball landed in a way that requires some intermediate screening

Blackbelt, knock down that elf! Our next move depends on it!

Mad Max blitzes, and Scourge assists

That lineman is surfing and get's KO'd!

Mad Max returns to save himself from a counter surf

Scourge moves upfield to annoy the elf there. He also happens to prevent access to our left hand flank by doing that. Pick whichever reason works better for you!

Mammoth blocks this guy

It's a stun!

Yes, jump on him too! Jump on him vewy woughly!

The stun remains.

Black Dynamite here blocks the witch elf. You know, the one we couldn't drop in the first half

Oh, it seems her luck just ran out!

She'll be sleeping for pretty much the rest of the game

Scotty isn't as impressive now

Swashmebuckle goes pick up the ball

And moves away from any possible blitzes

Finally, Black Knight takes this block against a blodge blitzer

Our turn #9 ends in a line abreast formation at LoS and with a deep screen in front of the ball carrier.

Elf turn #9

The blitzer moves back towards the center

The other moves in front of Spoon. There's already a player in front of Spoon, but Spoon didn't do anything last turn. Reason being, had he skulled, it would have been trivial to seep a couple of players towards our ball carrier.

The one immediately next to Spoon blitzes Scourge

Scourge: "Hehe that tickles" (Scourge takes block no 1)

And then we get yet another dodge to fill in the right hand side gaps

That's the elf turn #9

Swashmebuckle runs the ball closer, but lacks the movement range to be totally safe

Our former ball front screen is now the back cage, and our front line (Scotty, Mammoth) is now the front line of the cage. Confused? Good!

Black Knight moves in to take away that one die block possibility against Black Dynamite

Blackbelt takes one block. He honestly now just wants to hurt the elves. Well it does allow Mad Max to blitz next, but who cares about that?

He does the one die blitz to assist Scourge. Scourge shall not fall there!

... and knocks out Eldril! Well done Mad Max!

He goes a couple of steps further, and moves in to assist Scourge's blocks. Even if it took go for its, but we are feelin' lucky today.

Scourge blocks next, but this dude has dodge.

You know what? We have four re-rolls, so let's try that again!

Black Dynamite is getting frustrated here with the dodge skill. That's two pushes right there

This is the end result of our 10th turn

Elf turn #10

We get a two die block against Black Knight

Whatever it is, the elves must be feeling even luckier than us today. Given the immediate possibility of a turnover, that does get re-rolled.

Saved by Both Down eh? Then the opposition focuses their attention on Blackbelt, who goes down in this blitz.

And that's their turn #10.

Our turn #11

It's obvious that Swashmebuckle moves ahead near Spoon. The stronger the guarder the better.

Hey dumbass, move your ass to da left bottom corner!

Spoon actually does, and we get a nice cage straight in the middle of the pitch, splitting the elf lines in half.

Scourge takes another block at the dodgy elf, but it's a push nevertheless

Mad Max then blitzes the same dude. And since it's Mad Max, we get two rounds of blocks. Total of three attempts, let's see if he goes down this time

Very well, have it your way then.

The right hand black boyz deal with the elves too. Black Knight throws a dud block, it's that dodge that's hampering us.

Black Dynamite follows with equally poor results. Two pushes right there.

Our 11th turn ends with our players being centrally available, and the elf defensive line being in shambles.

Elf turn #11 sees a blitz against Mad Max

That won't do anything! Re-rolled!

Well, neither does that  :drevil:

Then starts the shuffle the card deck operation from the opposition. I'm not sure what they want to accomplish with these moves, but alright.

Say, that's quite a lot of dodges right there

Which is ended either by Dynamite or Knight


Our turn #12

Spoon, move ahead!

Really? Just one step!

Since our biggest muscle seems to be sucking his thumb this turn, we extend towards right

Swashmebuckle and the Monkees follow

This blitz is offered to you by Bloodweiser. Mammothtank pushes

Pushes? NO way! Re-roll!


Not then.

Scourge takes the sprinter down. Again

Blackbelt pushes

And Mad Max does two pushes in a row

So much for that bruising then.

Our twelth turn ends in a right hand cage, and smackdown in the left

Elf turn #12

Mad Max goes down

Oh, somebody is interested in the ball too!

The rest run to positions, but in front of to left hand bunch, not attempting to block the right hand ball cage's advance  :confused:

Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Vicious Hydras (Dark Elves), Game 21, Final Quarter (turns 13-16)

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Mammothtank blitzes the guy hanging out next to our cage. A push would be sufficient here, and push we get.

Unsurprisingly when the big and stocky black orc has been freed to move, the cage goes forwards. As much as they can, which is determined by the movement speed of the Black Orcs

The rest will mostly be about smacking the elves right dab in da middle of da eyes. Yes and Spoon manages to move again. The guard is important!

So that Scourge gets a three die block

That blitzer has been a pain

Well, he is out for the next turn at least.

Blackbelt moves in to make it harder to dodge away from our smackdown group

Our turn #13 ends with the cage being deep in the opposition end

Elf turn #13

This lone player suddenly realizes that the orcs can score next turn. He moves towards the cage, but is simply too far away to actually reach it.

Mok Crak is blitzed. I'm still puzzled why him and not the cage corners, but oh well.

Our 14th turn starts with, ahem, shall we say, strong position. That wont stop us from stalling the game, though.

And it's smackdown once again!

Hmm, have I seen this movie before?

Disappointingly, it's a stun. Not what I was looking for after that mean lookin' cut scene!

Here's two inconsequential blocks by Mad Max

Bloody blodging sons of witches...

Given the lack of anything to block, Spoon moves once again

Finally, Mammoth takes a risky one die block. It's a wrestler, so no harm done getting prone

Speaking about getting prone, now that it was a clear hit and a stun, why don't you jump on him?

Still a stun. That's our turn #14.

Elf turn #14

We seem to be getting pushes

The nerve! They attempt to block Spoon with two dices against them!


No such luck today, pal!

 :lol:  :lol:  :lol: Spoon levels up because of this!

The blodging blitzer is badly hurt and will not be seen in this game any more

Good boy Spoon!


Our turn #15
Scourge blocks the blodge blitzer. I know. It's hard to hit him!

Given the numbers advantage, Blackbelt gets a three die block against the very same blitzer

He is prone! The slippery eel is finally on the ground!

Mad Max blitzes to bring this elf closer to the players providing the well-earned smacking

The guy goes down, and Mad Max isn't able to bring him closer. Pity.

When ever there are bones a' cracking, you can bet you can find Mammothtank somewhere near!

Spoon re-positions once again, providing difficult dodges for anyone unfortunate enough to be in the middle

Given the amount of annoyance that blodge blitzer has caused, Mok Crak greets him. With his boot!

Yea, look at that hay maker!

The dude is finally out from the pitch! And the ref didn't even see it  :drevil:

Remember that one elf who came near the cage? Well, he gets company! From no-one else but Scotty and Black Dynamite!

Our 15th turn ends in this position. The only elf remaining standing is the guy next to the score line  :lol:

Elf turn #15

They seem to be getting closer to Mad Max?

Then the guy next to the cage decides this might start to hurt soon if he doesn't move

It's just that Scotty was waiting for this move, and tackles him fair and square (real orcs do it with arms only, none of that silly leg tackle stuff!)


Nope, not this time elf. You ain't safe here!


It's our turn #16

Given our lead and available re-roll, we take some fun blocks before scoring

Mok Crak moves next to Spoon to instruct him to move. Spoon moves once again.

Mad Max then gets two blocks in

Being a thrower and partially responsible for safe handling of the ball, Swashmebuckle throws the ball to Srihag!

Who catches it on the first attempt (now that's a first!), and scores!

The attrition is still taking place here

Two KOs come back, so they can possibly have maximum of 8 players on the pitch. Probably less, I don't think they had a full roster.

Given that there ain't no witches here, we are once again in wider defensive formation

The final kick comes here

It goes high

And we get a cage next to our black orcs. I don't mind

Dynamite suffers the last block, and goes down. No injuries or KOs, though

And we win 2-0!

Click here for the match outcome

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We get 40 grand, just what we were short of 400K. Good!

Scotty is the Most Valuable Player

The SPPs are delivered in spades. Half of our team earned SPPs!

Now that we have extra cash that's bloating our team value (2000+), I want to get rid of it so that we look more trim again. We invest in a bigger stadium.

This is the HLPBowlers roster after the match. Spoon and Trak level up! Congratulations!
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
Click here to see Spoon's level up
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We start from this

Roll the dice

It's not a double. Dangit, Spoon will remain a blocking risk, and will require assists to get three dices whenever possible.

He gets the Stand Firm skill, making him well rooted on the square he is occupying.

Click here for Blackbelt's level up

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So Blackbelt, our most decorated Black Orc, get's a level up

Let the dice roll!

A normal level up too.

Between tackle and guard, Blackbelt gets Guard

Click here to see Trak's level up

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So this line orc has learned enough to level up

And this is too a normal level roll

He get's the normal block skill

Trak's now closer to our beginning blitzers, except he doesn't have as much movement.

Remeber Rakclaw, our niggled line orc? I'm sorry to say this Rakclaw, but I'm going to have to let you go. Team, say farewell to Rakclaw. He won't be able to keep up with the rest of us with that injury of his.

Our next match will be against dorfs. Relatively well developed dorfs with Mighty Blow and Guard it seems. This might become painful!
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Spoon

  • 212
  • ヾ(´︶`♡)ノ
Good boy Spoon!

[02:42] <@Axem> spoon somethings wrong
[02:42] <@Axem> critically wrong
[02:42] <@Axem> im happy with these missions now
[02:44] <@Axem> well
[02:44] <@Axem> with 2 of them


Offline Mika

  • 28
Today's match up is against the Black Anvils, a successful dorf team in the Top 5 of the tournament. This match has potential for catastrophical loss where several of our players are injured. But the Armor Value 9 is what we trust.

HLPBowlers vs Black Anvils (Dwarfs), Game 22, First Quarter (Turns 1-4)

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Thankfully, their team composition doesn't include the Deathroller. Otherwise they do have four players with Mighty Blow, and five players with Guard! That's gotta be against the rules or something! And yes, the dorfs really do love their beer.

The team value difference is not very high, so they only get to hire Barik, a Dwarf star player

We are playing on their turf, so the stadium is not very impressive to say the least.

Barik is the dude with a red eye. Our intelligence doesn't reveal whether that's glass, ruby or something else valuable.

With dorfs, we do want to start with an offense. This maximizes our chances of getting rid of their players, and minimizes our chances of losing them. In principle.

It's once again the meatwall line abreast formation that we start from.

We get a kick (does kicking look easy to you in that outfit?)

And we get a Quick Snap kick off event

Thus we get in close contact to the opposition on both flanks. Our objective: crowd surf as many of the little bastards as possible.

We make the ball principally safe. Well at least one person is looking at it, and the dorfs can't run far with those stubby little feet of theirs!

You know that time is it kids! It's blocking time! Scourge, get rid of that dorf!

I apparently misplaced our blitzers, Mad Max should have been front, and this could have been a crowd surf without a blitz action. Especially now that Scourge knocked that one dorf down. Then again, the right hand side looked a bit more juicier...

Black Knight clears the way for Srihag and Scotty

Uh, Knight, that's not good enough! Get the dorf down! Re-roll!

Oh well then

Blackbelt here rolls a push and Both Down. At this point, most players start to have block or tackle, so Both Down tends to be negated

Black Dynamite here demonstrates what happens to Trollslayers that get too close.

They go prone!

Mammothtank blocks the guard blitzer here

No injury. Jump on it!

Aragorn girn seems to be stunned as a result. Good enough I guess for this turn.

Since Knight failed to knock down this one dorf, Srihag is now forced to take a risky one die block against a dorf.

It's unfortunately a direct hit, and no crowdsurf results. The dorf is not even stunned by the fall.

Swashmebuckle picks up the ball, and runs it in the middle

The reason why this is safe is because the dorfs are not known for their agility, and their both flanks are also down. They can only reach Swashmebuckle by rolling over Spoon and the cronies.

Speaking of Spoon, he makes a three die block here

Our first turn is not a smashing success, but it isn't a failure either. Yes, we failed to punch through the dorf lines, and we failed to reduce their numbers. However, they'll have problems blocking us as quite a lot of their LoS players are now prone.

Dorf turn #1

As expected, a significant fraction of their players are just standing up, and their back up row also engages more in the smackdown of the middle part

Here's the obligatory blitz

And that dorf by nature has Tackle, so Srihag's dodge wont help him here.

We also see an attempt to knock down Black Knight

That didn't seem to work so they re-roll!

Yes, that is a skull oh yeah.


Our turn #2

Unsurprisingly Swashmebuckle moves first to the safety of the front line

And that's a neat cage right in the middle of the pitch

Black Knight here then blitzes in attempt to release Scotty and Srihag

Yea that runner goes down.

Scotty blocks the line dorf next

Even with some extra piling on, the Dorf remains conscious

Then we have to focus our attention in the center, where Black Dynamite makes another three die block

That trollslayer got knocked down. Man these dorfs are resilient!

Finally, Mad Max blocks a line dorf

But since he has frenzy, he also has to commit the second block. Which turns out to be a skull!


Nope. Bad idea to begin with.


Dorf turn #2

Since Scotty is prone, this long beard seizes the moment, and blitzes Srihag, taking two Go For Its in the process. Scotty seems to screw over Srihag occasionally with his Piling On!


However, Srihag is OK. He will return to the pitch after a break. That blitzer needs Side Step badly!

Black Knight also gets tankarded

As does Mammothtank

Our turn #3
Yeah, that mistake of leaving Scotty down cost us Srihag and possibly Black Knight too. We do not have extra players to spare that could assist them, so you are on your own guys!

Here we have Blackbelt Jones blocking the Trollslayer. Who just doesn't want to go down. It's a push so that the cage can at least advance

Black Dynamite pushes this guy away so that the movement can commence

Spoon, would you kindly move?

He does! So the rest of the cage can follow, and the Black boyz that did the first pushes are now the back part of the cage

Black Knight blitzes the dorf runner. Perhaps there's a way out of this after all

...if he just rolled properly!

Great, so now the runner also humiliates Black Knight by knocking him out!


Dorf turn #3

The dorfs concentrate their players on the cage side lines. The front part is relatively unguarded with just two players, but it's the fact that we don't have extra players at the moment...

Like the sharks preying the weak and alone, the dorfs pounce on our unskilled line orc

Who luckily resists this blitz.

Then we see a two die against block against Black Dynamite

No potential for turnover there, so we get pushed further away from the cage.

Scourge gets blocked here too

He remains standing, grinning at the opposition. But there's more of that where it came from! The block is re-rolled!

And Scourge is still grinning, but remember that the trollslayer blocks twice!

Scourge is still standing after three consecutive blocks against him!

Our turn #4

Black Dynamite takes control of the rear part of the cage

Scourge levels this unlucky trollslayer that tried to knock him down thrice!

"See, that's how you do eet!"

Spoon takes a three die block against this long beard


He manages to injure that long beard!

It's a Badly Hurt long beard, we wont be seeing him again in this game

Scotty blitzes to provide some assistance for the cage

It's a knock down!

In attempt to remove that player, he also jumps on him

The situation at the end of this turn reminds me of a deserted island circled by sharks

Dorf turn #4

Given the amount of smackdown we gave them last turn, there aren't a lot of attacks coming to our way. A blitz was mounted against Scourge, who this time falls for it

But no follow-up was possible, so that's the situation we find ourselves in the next turn.

Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Black Anvils (Dwarfs), Game 22, Turns (5-8), They roll over us!

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Okay, so Scourge has to take back the place he just lost. He blitzes the trollslayer away

It's a push, and in attempt to make some maneuvering room, he also moves forwards to guard three dorfs

To reduce the pressure mounted on Scourge, Blackbelt Jones blocks the other trollslayer.

He also moves forwards, and is supported by Mammothtank.

Black Dynamite advances on the right hand side, clearing further space for the cage and players

Mok Crak moves up to close the upper part of the cage

Spoon takes a two die block against a long beard. He pushes the dorf away.

So our #5 turn seems to consolidate to the center pitch with miniscule advance forwards. That's not good at this point!

Dorf turn #5

We get a blitz against Mok Crak

It's a nice hit direct hit

Ooooh hells noo, don't you die on me now!

Well he didn't die, but it's a knock out. Just when we were already short of players!

Scourge drops next

But the one die against Spoon nets a turnover

It's re-rolled to a push

Blackbelt gets pushed here

And finally, they bunch up around Spoon to teach some manners for the troll

Since Blackbelt was pushed away, Mammoth is a one die target for the trollslayer

Mammoth is now prone too.

And that's their turn #5. Scary stuff

Our turn #6

Swashmebuckle, get the hell out of there!

He gets, of course, tackled

We HAVE to dodge that, re-roll!

It actually worked! This half may be winnable after all!

Dynamite follows to provide back guard

And Mammoth jump blitzes the trollslayer, he is the most direct threat to the ball carrier.

The trollslayer is also stunned! That's very good at this point!

Mammoth's higher mobility comes in to play here where he still manages to screen a substantial fraction of the upper area despite of having started from prone

Blackbelt, you HAVE to push that dorf away!

He follows to guard the area, well knowing that this might end up him getting smacked down. But the Orcz gotta do what what Orcz gotta do. Mad Max can then move to the upper left to screen Swashmebuckle, preventing nasty come backs.

Scourge stands up, and stands next to Blackbelt Jones. They look at each other and nod grimly. Let's get on with it!

Scotty attempts to block a player next to Spoon, but that's two both downs, and our re-rolls have been spent. Spoon and Scotty, we did our best, you are now our diversion!

Our 6th turn leaves the Swashmebuckle in the relative safety on the left hand side, but it really doesn't look very promising for scoring

Dorf turn #6

Spoon squeezes out another re-roll from the dorfs

It's a re-roll, so

Well Spoon, you actually did your part here this time!

Scotty is next in the line to get punched

Scourge absorbs a block too

And Blackbelt takes a direct hit

Bloody hell, what are these dorfs made of???

No, I don't think we can afford to lose a Black Orc at this point. We wont have enough orcs to protect the ball! MEDIIIIIIC!

He is just stunned. Good!

And that's their turn

Our Turn #7

In a re-enactment of robber and a police, Swashmebuckle runs as hard as he can

Black Dynamite trails

To maximize our chances of a knock down, Mad Max blitzes with frenzy

We take push here, I want this dorf to be next to the pitch

And it's a knockdown, well done!

The pitch seems oddly scarce of our players at the end of turn #7. And yes, Scotty had to stand up. He will then tie at least one player who does the block against him. Not good ods Scotty, but somebody's gotta do it.

Dorf turn #7

Three die block against Scotty is the start of the turn.

Thankfully, Scotty is OK.

We then get a blitzer reinforcing the left hand side

Scourge here is just doin' hiz job, squeezing out a re-roll from the dorfs

He is actually still standing!

...even after this Long Beard attempted to block him down.

That's the spirit Scourge! Just when we most needed it!

Our turn #8

Black Dynamite moves in to assist against this Barik dude.

Mad Max blitzes

And the crowd goes wild (on Barik's ass)

Mad Max then runs to the finish line. Hey, it's turn 8!

Swashmebuckle could score himself, but that's with two Go For Its, he instead moves closer to Mad Max

Going for it has an 83% success rate

Since Mad Max catching the ball has 67 % success rate regardless, the probability is the same. However, since Swashmebuckle can automatically re-roll the throw, it's better to throw it, and the probability for two go for its is the same. Hence we throw the ball, possibly netting Swashmebuckle too one SPP, and Mad Max might get three.

The pass succeeds! Can Mad Max catch it?

Boom! A touchdown! Nice, now we get two opportunities to get our KO'd players back!

However, this guy will not come back

And two our guys already wake up! Excellent!

The secret weapon is spotted by the ref

So we have taken two dorfs out from the game. But that's not enough!

We regroup to a defensive formation to the last turn of this half. This formation is probably the first time we have used it, it satisfies the requirement of three lineman in the LoS, and everybody else further away, reducing the risk of getting injuries.

We kick

And it's the perfect defence event. This time, it doesn't affect us.

We see a pick-up by a blitzer

Black Dynamite going down

Trak absorbs a block

And Spoon goes down

And it's half time!

Black Knight, get your ass over here!

Phew, that was a difficult offence!
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Black Anvils (Dwarfs), Game 22, Turns (9-12)

Hidden Text: Show
Alright, let's start the defensive half of the match. Threee three and five is the formation we believe in.

It's a kick!

Yes, another re-roll for us!

Swashmebuckle manages to kick the ball just behind the frontline. Outstanding! The dorfs have a bit of a problem in securing the ball.

But the pick-up works unusually well

Then we see some blocks. This two die against block (against Spoon) succeeds, as Spoon has no block.

With the looming guarding troll down on the grass, the follow up blocks are then more easy blocks where the opponent selects the outcome. Here Mok Crak resists a blitz and turns it to kinetic energy, meaning he moves backwards.

Black Dynamite wasn't as lucky this time

And here's the ending of Dorf turn #9

Our turn #9

Our primary target: get rid of all runners, that the opponent so nicely put to our flanks. To blitzable positions even.

Srihag takes the frenzy blitz here

Uncharacteristically, we take push.

And push again, so that the runner can only see the borderline next to his feet. Those fans are waiting...

With the right hand flank taken care of, and left hand runner being sandwiched between Mad Max and Mammothtank, we start our blocks in the LoS.

Special mention here for Trak who is proving to be useful with his newly acquired Block skill

Mok Crak takes one down too, and that's without any skill. Literally.

Swashmebuckle fills in a gap in our defensive muscle wall

And we end our turn #9 here

Dorf turn #10

The trollslayer blocks Mok Crak back, but his dauntless skill fails, so it's two dice against him.

Now, that being said, it doesn't mean that the block would fail. Which it didn't.

They then attempt to punch a hole through Spoon with a blitz

For a reason or the other, it gets re-rolled!

Well ain't that a rut? It's of course a turnover!

Our turn #10

Yes Scotty, take'em down!

Uh Scotty, that's not taking him down! Re-roll!

Ah, better!

That's actually much better!

We won't be seeing that runner in this game we ain't.

Mammothtank blocks the left hand side runner

And it's the standard Mammoth block with a follow up jump

Which doesn't have any effect this time. You can't win them all!

Then it's the LoS turn.

Blackbelt manages another push

Trak and the trollslayer slap each other, both looking at their fists wondering why it didn't do anything

Dynamite repositions on the left side. LoS duty of course.

Srihag and Swashmebuckle move up to cut the further access towards right

And Spoon, you don't block this time!

Dorf turn #11

We are seeing once again those two dice against blocks here. Spoon gets blitzed again

And it's re-rolled! (AI?)

We take push. But because Spoon has been learning how to stand, he stands firmly on his ground, not allowing access forwards

Thus the next block against Trak is a single die.

But the block is good, and Trak goes down. Seeing that the front line is pretty much blocked by STR 4 and STR 5 dudes, the dorfs attempt to pivot to left.

Then we see another one die block.

God dammit Blackbelt, stop flexing and start defending!

He's out for a turn, but otherwise OK. Good.

Swashmebuckle takes a block. They have tackle, so our reliant Thrower is down

Our turn #11

Scotty moves to left to provide back up blitzing power if somebody quadskulls in the early part of the turn

We need a player to assist, so Scourge attempts to get rid of a dorf

Black Dynamite downs a trollslayer

And Mok Crak can move to assist against the ball carrier

Mammoth blocks the Runner

Well I'm sort of happy that I did provide the rest of the players where they were needed before throwing this one.


And since that Runner is now next to Mad Max and the border, the next move is to surf him

And that's ladies and gentleorcs, how you take out dorf runners

Srihag takes a one die block against a long beard

We end our 11th turn to these positions. Direct contact to the ball carrier. Tsk tsk

Dorf turn #12

It's a one die against Mok Crak

Then they thought about blocking Swashmebuckle. I mean, Swashmebuckle has the weakest armor of the Orc team (discounting goblins), so I sort of see the point. But he has block and dodge, and even with tackle, the probability to knock him down with a single die is 33 %. With these two dice, Swashmebuckle is only about to move.

We get again a two die block against, but this isn't punished. Well neither is Trak, but you get the point.

The center player wisely attempts to abort the fight with Spoon, and runs away

What? Spoon managed to tackle him?!!  :lol:


Oh noes, that's his right leg!

If I'm not mistaken, this is the first time Spoon caused a turnover with a tackle!


Our turn #12

Needless to say, our priority is to get the ball get the ball gettheballgettheball

Scotty provides some extra muscle

Mammothtank blocks the trollslayer guarding the ball carrier

Nope, you'll have to do better than that!

Well, that's indeed better!

The trollslayer is also badly hurt. Good!

Then we see two consequtive blocks against the ball carrier, courtesy of Mad Max

Second one connects! Impact! Boom! Oh yeah!

The ball scatters a bit unfortunately for us, since most of our players have already moved. Those who can, form a cage around the ball! Scourge makes the upper left corner

Black Dynamite takes care of the lower right corner

And Spoon?


Trak accomplishes nothing with this block

Swashmebuckle disengages and attempts to run close to the ball to pick it up next turn.

He makes it. He is so dodgy!

Srihag attempts to disengage and move to a scoring position.

Well it was 50/50, so fair is fair


Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Black Anvils (Dwarfs), Game 22, Final Quarter (Turns 13-16)

Hidden Text: Show
Dorf turn #13

We are seeing a concentration of dorfs on our right flank? Why AI why? The ball is loose on the left hand side!

Yes, we get a blitz against Blackbelt Jones

And it starts again  :shaking:

Blackbelt is knocked out! I repeat Blackbelt has left the pitch!

Then there's an attempt to get closer to the ball. This attempt succeeds, but the ball is still well guarded

And Trak takes a push

Our turn #13

Srihag moves back to the cage to be of assistance when needed

Trak takes the tackling dorf down, freeing Swashmebuckle

Swashmebuckle moves then towards the ball, but given the limited Orc movement, can't pick up the ball this turn without significant risks

So we cleanse the ball surroundings of dorf scum. Black Dynamite takes down one dorfs

Mammothtank takes care of the other one with stoile!

Well, at least you got to jump on him if nothing else.

Mok crak reinforces the left hand flank of the cage

Eye on the turn counter, Scotty decides to pick the ball up

Oh, what do I know, he managed to do it

That's our turn #13

Dorf turn #14

Those who can, run or attempt to run ahead of us.

We get one die blitz against Scotty, but he holds steady and takes away the power of the block by moving.

That's their turn. Basically.

Our turn #14

Black Dynamite takes the dude who blitzed Scotty down.

Spoon moves forwards in search of a better cage position

Wait, did I really entrust him with that assignment?

Swashmebuckle screens the cage now that Spoon ain't there.

Mammothtank blitz blocks again

Don't jump! You're assigned to the cage duty now!

Mok crak moves up to provide further cover

Scourge becomes one with the turf, and is a road block on the left flank. Please do get up, dorf!

Mad Max moves behind him to further strengthen this line

And then Scotty moves to the makeshift cage. Surprise dorfs! You thought we go through in the middle, but we move to the left! Again!

Srihag takes the final dodge to be able to score those last three SPPs he needs

No then


Dorf turn #15

We have penetrated quite far on their left flank. Let's see how they respond

Apparently by focusing their attention to players far outside the actual important range. Stay strong Swashmebuckle!

And like a lion stalking its prey, the dorfs find the weakest link in our cage. There's a block against Mok Crak, who is unskilled. A factor on our side is that it's a one die

A skull! Re-roll!

Another skull! Well done Mok Crak!

And he promptly kills him!  :lol:


Our turn #15

After he has done the deed, Mok Crak casually keeps on running towards the finish line

Scotty and Mad Max follow

And then we block!

Not terribly impressed, Black Dynamite

Mammoth goes next

But that AV9 is hard to crack

Srihag "Dodger" moves close to Spoon. Maybe he'll get to finish line next turn then. This turn he certainly won't.

Scourge takes a block too. We are not impressed.

Swashmebuckle gets the hell out of dodge. Ironically, by dodging

Our 15th turn demonstrates pretty much an unstoppable offense. Most of the dorf players are nowhere near the ball carrier, and those who are, are also in the tackle zones.

Dorf turn #16

Trak feels the dwarven wrath as the frenzied trollslayer strikes him down

Srihag squeezes out a re-roll here

Defender stumbles, of course

Spoon gets pushed. But remember he can stand really firm, and does not budge

Our turn #16

Swashmebuckle runs ahead to the side. Maybe he wants to show mental support?

Since Srihag is down and cannot reach the score line, Mok Crak goes first

Scotty hands over the ball. Come on 67 %!

You left-handed idiots! Re-roll!

And that works

Moktrak scoooooooores!

And that happened to be the final turn of the match

Click here for the match outcome
Hidden Text: Show

80 grand with a six? Not too shabby! Note, we are incurring spiralling expenses, that's because our team value has increased and as with any socialistic system, the bloat bleeds our money!

Our Most Valuable Player is Moktrak

Who managed to get 10 SPPs in this match! Holy hell, all hail the all star rookie Moktrak! He almost levelled twice in this match alone!

HLPBowlers team roster looks like this after this match, with Mad Max and Moktrak levelling up
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
Click here for Mad Max's level up
Hidden Text: Show

Mad Max rolls 8 for the level up. It's a normal level up then.

He gets Mighty Blow for further injury potential

Click here for Mok crak's Moktrak's level up
Hidden Text: Show

Oooooh boy, he rolls 11!

That's definitely going to be +AG then. He can then dodge and pick up the ball as easily as the elves!

Moktrak who? Doesn't ring a bell  :lol:

The next match will be the season finale. 23rd game is now a reality, and we go against the Poisoned Tadpoles


* Mika runs to the translator to check that he understood the word correctly *

Yeah, Tadpoles. Really

The T-rex there is a Kroxigor beast. It's a Big Guy like Spoon, but slightly less retarded, him being just boneheaded in comparison to really stupid

Uhuh, this might be difficult. 6 sauruses and a Kroxigor, meaning 7 (!) buff players! With four players with Mighty Blow to boot with! They outstrength us from the beginning, and the Orcs do not get claw to punch through that armor of theirs!

See the exiting season conclusion tomorrow!
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.

Dey look mean, but we meaner!


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Poisoned Tadpoles (Lizardmen), Game 24, Season Finale, Turns 1-4

This is it boyz! Today we play for the championship! Everybody stay on your toes, we gotta do this, and we gunna do it good Orc style! Today we try to hunt down the opposition skinks, in the name of the great Orc strategist Zun Zun, we attack where the opposition is weakest! If we take out a number of their skinks, the saurus cannot play the ball. Yes they can still punch, but the team scoring more wins the game.

Everybody clear about that?  Good! Let's go play some BLOOD BOWL!

Hidden Text: Show

Our inducements include a Bloodweiser babe. There will be knocked out Orcs in this game.

Before dwelving any further in the game, feast your eyes on our stadium that was just recently upgraded with 400 K! (it's actually the first time to me too when I see the stadium at this upgrade level)

We win the coin toss. We'll be receiving no doubt about that! There's something about getting those first punches in before the opposition can do anything.

Our offensive format is a box this time. Blitzers at the flanks, Moktrak and Swashmebuckle at the back for ball handling.

And it's the kick off! I hope you've prayed Nuffle for good blocking dice! There's no turning back here!

The opposition kicks high. This gives us time to move a player below the ball, attempting an immediate catch of the ball. Unfortunately, Moktrak, despite his good agility, fails to catch the ball and it drops next to him.

So the ball landed next to Moktrak. Our mobile force, blitzers and Swashmebuckle, move around to cage the ball in. Those skinks can easily dodge in and out with a reasonably successful percentage, so we definitely want to attempt the pick up this turn.

But first we attempt to remove the opposition players from the LoS. Scourge manages a push

So do Blackbelt and Black Knight

Black Dynamite then manages both down, but this saurus is skilled enough to know how to block these punches. The end result: nothing happens, with players keenly eyeing each other in the best Western standoff kind of way.

Spoon takes a block too. Just don't fail me now troll!

Oh! A cut-scene!

Yay! Spoon is useful! He knocked out one saurus straight on the first turn! It's 11 against 10 game now!

Trak attempts the pick up next

That's our turn #1

Lizards Turn #1

The knocked down LoS stands back up. Their skinks pressure our cage, but do not take contact with it, probably for the better of their own well-being and continued existence.

One saurus gets into contact with our cage. However, their blitz is against Scourge.

Their blitz this turn was about equally powerless than our Black Orcs in our turn so I guess that makes us even.

Our turn #2

Our first objective is to get rid of that pesky saurus just in front of our cage. He goes down and Scotty greets him with his boots. Spiked boots

Despite the spikes, the Saurus is OK.

We reform the cage just behind the LoS wall o' meat, blitzers and Swashmebuckle providing the cover

Mammothtank then blitzes their skink.

Can't.... resist.... the temptation


Mammoth actually is skilled with tackle, so that dodge move ain't gonna help that skink here

Whoa, it really didn't

And he is out. Out from the next game too, with his gouged eye! It's 11 vs 9 now!

Mammoth follows back to the cage, reinforcing our strength in the middle of the pitch, and not giving easily singled out players for the opposition

Black boyz, do your job!

Black Dynamite ends our turn right here

Oooh no

He got a smashed hip? No way, MEDIIIIIC!

What sort of dead-eyed doctors we have on our payroll? They mistook broken ribs for smashed hip bone!

10 vs 9 now


Lizard turn #2

The skinks gathered around Scourge. They brought their players back from the left hand side, probably to stop our advance in the middle field

Scourge gets blitzed, and gets knocked down.

Blackbelt falls too!

Well, down goes the troll! Luckily, Spoon has Stand Firm, so the opposition cannot advance their players as Spoon fell directly down.

So, our front line crumbled completely, with opposition still having a strength advantage in the proximity.

It's our turn #3

Blackbelt stands up, and readies himself for the inevitable rebound blow that is bound to happen on the Lizard turn. Scotty then blitzes the lizard that approached the cage, attempting to knock him down.

This isn't a knock down! Re-roll!

That's better Scotty!

Our blitzers certainly do have their very own special way of showing respect to the opposition. The respect the opposition deserves!

No armor break there either.

Spoon is Really Stupid, and forgot how to get up from the ground

The ball moves slightly up, with Swashmebuckle and blitzers once again providing cover for the cage

Black Knight blocks this saurus. It would be really handy to get the saurus down for the next turn!

Knight makes it. Our turn #3 ends with steadily mounting pressure on our LoS players, and on the cage flanks. See Scourge there in the middle of skinks? I'm not sure whether he's got a thing for those, or those things have got a thing for him.

Lizard turn #3

They start with a frisky blitz against Swashmebuckle.

He absorbs the hit and goes down, but his armor value 8 holds!

Blackbelt gets blocked too

Apparently this was not good enouogh, and it gets re-rolled

Aaaand Blackbelt goes down once again. You know boyz, I'm starting to worry about this thing right here...

The Kroxigor beast is luckily Bone-headed, and doesn't do anything for this turn.

Our turn #4

Black Knight knocks this saurus down. We HAVE to get it off Swashmebuckle.

Here we play risky, attemtping two die block against a saurus with Mad Max

Push is not good, but perhaps the next block which happens to be two dice against turns out OK

It didn't. It's a turnover unless we re-roll

Which we do. Unfortunate, it's turn #4 and we're already out of re-rolls here!

But the ball must still move

Srihag blocks the saurus with two assists, and gets the dino down! Very good!

Our Turn #4 ends in a precarious position. The lizards have a direct contact from the start with our upper right hand corner

Lizard turn #4

Mammothtank gets blocked, but no dice this time

Mad Max doesn't luck out this time, and gets knocked down

Remember that Scourge was surrounded by a bunch of skinks? They didn't go away!

That's a push, however humiliating that might be for a black orc

This skink finally nails Scourge, and hits him knocking Scourge down

Knocked down by a skink!? How inappropriate!

Spoon gets blocked by the Kroxigor beast.

Both down! And it's a re-roll! Come on Armor Value 8, live Spoon, live!

 :lol:  :lol:


Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
HLPBowlers vs Poisoned Tadpoles (Lizardmen), Game 23, Season Finale, Turns 5-8

Hidden Text: Show
The way the game works for us in this instance is that the lizards do not have sufficient player count just in the middle. We take the path of least resistance, and run the ball to the middle

We also need to get Moktrak able to move, hopefully without rolling dice. But we do have to roll the dice to get that. Scotty blites the tackling saurus

The push is good enough, that one tackle zone is at least removed

The cage is then reformed and Moktrak can run to the middle, temporarily safe again

With Srihag having dodge skill, we want to get him out to help the center. If it fails, it fails, our main priority is achieved this turn

Blackbelt Jones blocks a saurus here

We get some progress on our Turn #5, but we are hampered by the lack of available re-rolls!

Lizard turn #5

They attempt to break our upper right hand corner of the cage. And succeed. Bastards

This saurus next to the ball carrier is a bit annoying to say the least

Blackbelt Jones then gets blocked, but he is OK - yet

Scourge is still playing with skinks

One of them actually attempts to stop our cage. That's a bit iffy with STR 2 player, AI!

Our turn #6

We have a lizard infestation problem here. Two saurus are standing next to our ball carrier, and we have to deal with them somehow.

Black Knight takes a blitz, and hopefully knocks this one down. He actually does!

Srihag moves ahead to add a tackle zone between left hand side players and our cage

Taking into account that this saurus is STR 5, we don't have good means of stopping it. It's one die, with some 67 % probability of getting rid of its tackle zone, or a dodge move at 83%. We go with dodge

It luckily works, and Mammoth follows the cage

Seeing his opportunity has came, Scourge blocks one of the skinks that ventured too far towards the black orc

Then Spoon blocks the Kroxigor beast

 :lol:  :lol:  :lol:  :lol:
And injures the Kroxigor out of the pitch! That helps immensely, Spoon! Since when did you start to rock?

Scotty moves his tackle zone to the left, blocking assists from left hand side

Mad Max dodges away from the lizards

Blackbelt Jones doesn't like his chances against two sauri. He also reasons himself to dodge the heck out of there

His agility just isn't that good for moves like that, and gets tackled


Scourge here gets blitzed by the unemployed saurus from the down field that were just guarding Blackbelt

Scourge is still OK

Being freed, this skink then takes advantage of his mobility and moves up

The other lizard near Blackbelt's position then approaches the lower right hand corner of the cage. Three sauri there, not good unless we get some distance between them and us

Another saurus guards Scourge

The Tadpoles commence their cage breaking action. Mad Max goes down here

Scourge gets pushed once more

Our turn #7

Blackbelt stands up to provide assistance against the three lizards on bottom part of the cage

Scotty blitzes. Get rid of that saurus, pronto!

Ask and ye shall receive. And don't jump!

Scotty moves to assist then on the left hand side

And then we run. As far and as fast as we can. As Orcs.

Swashmebuckle closes the direct access towards Moktrak from right hand side

Now, given the amount of blocks and humiliation Scourge has had to endure in this drive, it's just natural he's up for some payback

It's only a stun. Very close though.

Our seventh turn ends to a position like this. I think we managed to crack through their defenses, but at what cost?

Lizards' turn #7

Scourge is apparently quite a road block here

This is a direct hit on Mad Max who was tying two saurus down there. C'mon orc, stay alilve!

It's a knock down!

9 vs 9 now

Blackbelt goes down too. Mad Max and Blackbelt were delaying the lizard advance towards our ball cage, respect their determination boyz!

Scourge gets blocked once again, this time he goes down.

Then we see a skink attempting to dodge away from Srihag

Yes, it gets re-rolled, and skink is from our tackle zone

It's our turn #8. I suppose nobody is surprised that given the lack of re-rolls, this is the only thing that we do.

That's actually a pretty zoggin' nice stadium we got here

So let's recap our dead, injured and KO's

Black Dynamite is injured, so that's clear

Mad Max remains sleeping

The Kroxigor and the skink are injured and out

But the KO'd saurus comes back

And it's the same three three and five formation for our defense

There's the kick for the last turn of first half

Perfect defense eh? I might actually moves something now

The last three and five rows move one square back for increased protection, leaving Spoon and a lineman to deal with the marauduing dinos

Here they come!

The skink fails the pickup and it gets re-rolled succesfully

The ball is brough little downfield, and we get our first blitz

Scourge stands strong!

So does Black Knight

Skink runs away, understandably as their LoS blocks aren't going that well as planned

Here's the one die against Spoon that knocks him down once again

You know what time it is? It's half time!

Whoa, that stadium is just huge! I mean look at that vertical!

Truly a worthy avenue for such game today

Black Dynamite is out

But Mad Max comes back for the second half! Welcome Max!

And they are missing the two injured lizards on the second half.

Next half is going to be more difficult, as it's our defensive. But we don't need to worry about protecting the ball, so that's the good side of it.

Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
Re: Let's play Blood Bowl 2
HLPBowlers vs Poisoned Tadpoles (Lizardmen), Game 23, Season finale, Turns 9-12

Hope you boyz got refreshed in the changing rooms, you did good on the first half, but we still have to manage through the second half. It ain't gonna be easy.

Hidden Text: Show
Alright. It's our defensive turn, so we have to do the same we did in the end of last half, but this time, it's more like that and lasts for the entire half.

Swashmebuckle kicks the ball

And the Lizards get a free re-roll!?

Well, that's a first on this season. And I thought we were ahead on all polls!

Here we see the lizards attempting a break through on our right side. The ball carrier is guarded by several skinks, and there's STR 5 saurus (he's as strong as Spoon) on the LoS, making things even worse. Here, Trak absorbs a saurus blitz, and that just moves him backwards. No big deal.

What, even more skinks on the right side? I thought this one would attempt to go through the left side

A saurus rolls the blocking dice (two against him) against Spoon. Very lucky, both options are direct hits.

But it's the Spoon's Stand Firm skill that stops the onslaught on its tracks. The troll wont be moved, so there's no opening forming through our middle LoS. That was a very good skill choice, it's even more handy than I thought!

Black Knight goes down with equally good blocking dice

That's the saurus 9th turn. We start our own #9 just now.

Spoon and Black Knight stand up to provide some buffer once again. Spoon specifically is surrounded by 4 sauruses! They still won't be able to get a three die block against Spoon, but it's getting closer to that! So principally Spoon will be a punching bag here, tying hopefully at least a couple of saurus next to him as they really cannot dodge away from the tackle zones. We start to form a defensive screen behind, the skinks can quite reliably skim through three tackles zones exerted by a single player. For that reason, we make the defense double layered

Our mobile force consisting of blitzers (especially with tackle skill) moves to block the access routes through middle to right hand sides. If you want to get through, you'll have to work for it!

Things being readied fail safe on the screen side, Scotty takes a blitz against the skink guarding the ball carrier

Yeah, pile on!

Close, but no dice. Courtesy of that stun, the skink is out for a turn

Srihag moves next the STR 5 saurus to provide assistance for the blocking, that is, if we get that far this turn.

Getting two assists from guarding Spoon and Blackbelt, he rolls two dice against the saurus, and knocks him down

Scourge takes this risky one die block against STR 5 saurus. C'mon orc, get him out of the pitch!

No such luck today. Our 9th turn ends in quite good defensive position, but leaving our left hand side empty.

Lizards' turn #10

The lizards reinforce right hand side with an additional skink. That's definitely a force to be reckoned with.  :drevil:

On the left hand side, a saurus gets close to Mammothtank

And then we mainly get blocks

Scourge remains standing

Spoon unfortunately, does not. He manages to tie two sauruses on that location.

That was a tough enough blow to stun Spoon

That's the lizard turn #10

Our turn #10

We add reinforcements on the right hand side, Moktrak goes behind Swashmebuckle to exert additional tackle zones behind him. Additionally, if Swashmebuckle falls due to skinks ganging up on him, Moktrak is in prime position to punish them.

Mad Max blitzes here. It's the new skink on the block!

Take push, I repeat, take the push!

Still take the push!

And the skink is injured by the crowd! I just love the TOOOT sound the make when they get punched!

He hand is fractured, so he'll not be playing in next game

To protect himself from the deal that happens between Scotty and Srihag, Mad Max moves one square away from the border. With a go for it to boot.

Given the skinks clustering on our right hand side, Blackbelt moves a bit towards right to provide some guarding muscle around

This allows Scourge to block the STR 5 saurus again. It's a clean hit, but no impact on the saurus

Srihag then moves next to the ball carrier, making it very difficult to dodge towards our left hand side flank.

Trak moves to the center of the pitch to be ready for anything

Only then we have enough courage to pull the available LoS centerline blocks. Knight knocks down a saurus

And Mammothtank fails a dodge from a saurus

Yes, re-roll that!

Tough luck, Mammoth


Lizard turn #11

This saurus follows keenly Trak's path. I wonder if it is the scent or the eyesight?

Then there's the long distance blitz that was to be expected

Unfortunately, Srihag goes down from the clean hit to da face

It's a stun

Then we get a skink blitz against Scotty. It's a one die blitz, and that both down gets re-rolled as the skink doesn't have block.

And Scotty remains strong

Seemingly frustrated, the lizards then pour their frustration on our center line

Black Knight get hit here

Awww crap


He is injured and badly hurt. Damn, we really needed that muscle in this game!

Our turn #11

Mammothtank is now able to move freely. He supports our screen just behind the LoS

Scotty here eyes the skink who blitzed him last turn. Think you got what it takes lil' skink?

Unfortunately, even jumping on the hapless skink doesn't stun him this time.

Mad Max blocks this skink here. He manages to knock out the skink!

Yay, we got some attrition happening! Two skinks have been pushed out of the pitch, making it 10 vs 9 for us.

Boyz, swarm that skink fortress right on this minute!

Swashmebuckle obeys

Moktrak blitzes. He doesn't even have block, and it's a one die. Be nice, baby needs a new pair of shoes!

It's a hit! And given that there's no room to move anywhere, the ball carrier is crowd surfed

10 vs 8 now

As the ball carrier went off pitch, he still had the ball in his clutches. The audience doesn't want to stall the game, so they kick the ball near Spoon. Moktrak goes next to the skink to add a tackle zone so that the skink must roll dodge if he wants to attempt ball pick up.

Trak must then get near the ball to add a tackle zone on it to make ball pick up harder

He fails the first dodge. It must be that tail of those lizards I tell you! Re-roll!

The re-roll succeeds, and he gets next to Spoon on the LoS. Blackbelt then blocks the saurus wedging forwards

The result is inconclusive.

Scourge then pushes another saurus behind our LoS

In our 11th turn, we managed to knock out the ball carrier and the ball landed next to our LoS, but we are far from safe. A skink can still easily pick that ball up if we let them

Saurus turn #12

Mammothtank sees a friend once again

Moktrak gets blocked by the very saurus he blitzed. The hit connects

Ouch! It connects too well!

Our superstar rookie gets his hand smashed, and he will miss the next game

The skink dodges free from the pressure

And then we get the regular two dice against blocks. Scourge remains on his feet

We get another block from the STR 5 saurus

Ah-HA! It's a skull! It's also re-rolled!

The center field blocks are once again one die blocks with predictable inconsequential results

Our turn #12

We start with a rare action: Swashmebuckle blocs a skink!

Ooooh! Cutscene!

Swashmebuckle lets that down-trotten thrower rage to boil up as signified by this photographic picture


I'm starting to think that with a stance like that, he should block more!

The skink is badly hurt and out of the game. One skink remains on the pitch!

Mad Max blocks this saurus next. The saurus has fend, so he can't be crowdsurfed this turn!


That's some massive right hand upper hook right there

And the dino is knocked out! Wonderful!

Scotty blitzes the last skink standing

These dice leave something to be wished for indeed. Just push him next to the borderline then!

We would also need to get the center field dinos down this turn to get the thing in my mind done. Blackbelt, knock it down!

With the dino being down, only three dinos stand, and they are all marked with our black orcs. Thus Trak can attempt the ball pick-up

It works without a re-roll! Madness! Trak of course, runs the hell away from the center to left hand side, making sure none of the sauruses can get to him.

Spoon, could you take that one saurus down so that they have only two standing in the beginning of next turn?

Hooo boy, here it comes!

The saurus falls down stunned as a big wet THUD echoes on the stadium.

Then Mammothtank dodges away from the right hand side to protect Trak

Phew, that's our turn 12 done, with a much better outlook at hand!

Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
Re: Let's play Blood Bowl 2
HLPBowlers vs Poisoned Tadpoles (Lizardmen), Game 24, Season Finale, Final Quarter (Turns 13-16)

Hidden Text: Show
Lizard turn #13

Our stronger presence on right hand side draws in bigger lizards. Scourge the ever reliant blocker is knocked down here. The tough as nails black orc is still OK, and thinks the rest of the team owes him Bloodweiser Beer and some roasted halfling leg for this

The buff saurus moves up to apparently protect the skink. We'll have to see how that goes

There's once again that lucky two dice against block that knocks Blackbelt down

The skink pushes Scotty away

And that's it.

It's our turn #13

Trak and Mammoth have decided to run. And run like hell they do, because if the sauri catch them, their lives might be abruptly shortened!

Srihag moves in to assist against these muscular sauruses

Scotty gets a hit on the skink with two blocking dice

This time, he hits straight to the mark, that's between the eyes.

The skink broke his ribs. Ain't gonna be playing in a next match then!

"Mission accomplished!"

Mad Max moves in to assist in the center

Scourge blitzes the annoying STR 5 saurus

Yea, that's a black orc for ya!

Swashmebuckle runs up to protect his precious hide. That also happens to block an access towards the upper pitch if the saurus next to Spoon suddenly got smart

Spoon takes this block, but it's a push

Our 14th turn seems to seal the deal, this will very likely be a 2-0 game

Lizard turn #15

That last block that broke the skink's ribs seems to have annoyed a saurus. Scotty goes down, but his armor holds.

Mad Max gets blocked too in the center pitch. You are receiving those punches well boyz! Just keep on doing that and they have forgotten the ball!

Spoon resists a two die block

This gets re-rolled!

Oh fate and the irony!

And in the end, the troll doesn't even move. He is standing firm, annoying the heck out of the lizards surrounding him.

That troll just wont go down!

Our turn #15

The ball moves slightly up, and we make a stall right here. This way the dinos don't get an attack run against us in the kick off following scoring.

Blackbelt moves in to block access towards our players near the score line. Spoon actually manages to stand up too.

Scourge blitzes the dino, and we are looking at a crowd surf right here

Crowdsurfin', provided to you by Srihag

Unfortunately, the audience isn't British enough to actually injure the saurus.

Mad Max dodges away to protect Srihag from a counter surf

Or at least he is attempting to do that

Yes, that will be a re-roll!

And he makes it there! Great! Only Spoon is guarding the prone sauruses, but the game is in the bag

Lizard turn #16

Scourge gets blitzed right off the start

And Scourge goes down, but you'll need something better to take out the battle hardened black orc!

Spoon gets blocked here, and the push is re-rolled

Unfortunately, our beloved troll has not grasped the concept of blocking, and he goes down as a result of this one die Both Down.

He is also knocked out. But I think he did his job admirably this game, so enjoy your forced nap!

It's our 16th turn

The STR 5 saurus has been a real bane of our existence straight from the start, so the boyz thought the could give him a little something

To maximize our potential of knock down, Mad Max blitzes

The first one connects

And Scotty, give that over-grown salamander the big ol' boot

That stuns the saurus. Good enough for this point, we are not going to foul at turn 16 if we can score

Blackbelt pushes this saurus one square at a time

And that's the end of our turn 15

Lizard turn #16

There's the blitz

It's against Scotty, who did the fouling last turn. Who knew the lizards had a sense of justice?

But given the dice results, justice did not get served.

And that's actually their turn. No other players could be blocked because there was not contact.

Our turn #16

Trak moves the ball in

The crowd goes wild, it's the HLPBowlers home turf, and we just won the championship!

The final number of the match stands at 2-0, a humiliating (and probably painful and bruised) defeat for the lizards

HLPBowlers are the rightful champion! All hail the champion!

Check out the stadium for the one last time!

And we take a team photo right here just after the win

Pile on modders!

Click here for the match outcome
Hidden Text: Show

*** NEXT DAY ***

Uh I think we overdid dat Bloodweizer fing last night

So how much did we win in da end?

Dem crowd was lousy tightwads! Re-roll da winnings

Wot? Da same lousy 40K? How can da pro live off dis?

Lousy tightwads

Our Most Valuable Player is Black Knight. Scourge and Spoon deserve also a special mention for their LoS duty

A ton of SPPs were gained from da match

HLPBowlers reigns supreme in the Championship cup, with a healthy 7 won game difference to the second team Mouldy Wanderers, the Skaven team.

This is the team portrait here once again, note our team value is down some 200 K because of the injured black orcs

Black Knight levels up

He rolls 6, a 4 and a 2, so nothing fancy here

He learns to punch harder, an essential skill for the black orcs

Click here for over the season team statistics
Hidden Text: Show

HLPBowlers averagely scored 1.6 touchdowns in a game, and caused 60 casuality events in this tournament

The team killed nine opposition players in total, and caused 308 injuries in total (60 casualities are lasting injuries I think). Injuries I believe also include stuns and KOs.

We knocked out 61 players in total, so only one more knock out than casualty

We gave one touchdown over the whole season which went to the early rat team if I'm not mistaken.

18 of our players were injured over the time, and 26 got knocked out.

Two of our players were killed during the season, Tukost the line orc and Squigmink the goblin who got punched by dwarf in the game where Spoon nearly got killed.

That would be the team statistics.

Write up here if you'd like to see your player final statistics at the end of season.
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.


Offline Mika

  • 28
Re: Let's play Blood Bowl 2
Then some more real life statistics:

Averagely, one Blood Bowl game takes about one hour. Writing the match takes about four hours, one hour per quarter. So a single game took 5 hours in total, and given 23 games, this was an effort of 115 hours. However, I had to correct the broken links at some point so I think we are talking about 120+ hours adventure here.

I think 15 - 20 liters of Czech and German beer was consumed during the write ups.

The total run time of the season was roughly half a year, with a possibility of hastening it to five months had I remained healthy in August.

If we are to play a next season, I'd like to make it more role-playing oriented, and focus less on the movements on the pitch. Possible teams are the Norse (bashy but fragile warriors), and the High Elves in the truest Game of Thrones fashion (you never know who dies next). The Orcs as a role playing team isn't that good, as their motivations are single sided, and there's not really much what you could imagine would be the chit chat of the Orcs. However, High Elves and the Norse are probably better for this, especially the filthy rich arrogant better-than-thou SOBs known as the high elves. Blood Bowl game design would definitely provide sufficient number of unexpected twists to that tale.  :lol:

Before the HLPBowlers, I haven't played an orc team, and it turned out to work well up to 1800-1900 team value, but as you could see from the last matches, the other teams started to catch up with bash, and if we were to continue with HLPBowlers to a second season, we would see more injuries, more blood and more dead orcs - which is not necessarily a bad thing. Specifically Chaos team will rip through our lines next time, and dorfs and lizards weren't too shabby either at the end.

Had the finale game lasted much longer, we would have been out-muscled from the pitch given they still had four sauruses, and we got two black orcs. Then again, Spoon started to be cool at the end with Stand Firm and Guard, missing only the essential Block skill. Our black orcs started to function only around the middle of the season with their block level ups, while the blitzers were at it from the beginning. The goblins turned out to be quite useless, and often blocked due to their STR 2, hence I had to get rid of them regardless of how much Spoon wanted to eat them.

If we are to play another season, now that the game's been introduced here, I'll also give some amount of control for you on how to develop your players.
Relaxed movement is always more effective than forced movement.

Re: Let's play Blood Bowl 2
Great work, Mika! It's always impressive when an LP gets finished, because I know how much work they are to produce...


Offline swashmebuckle

  • 210
  • Das Lied von der Turd
    • The Perfect Band
Re: Let's play Blood Bowl 2
That was fun, thanks Mika!

If you do another season, I don't think we'd lose much entertainment value if you summarized the matches' overall movements with just the key plays being highlighted rather than illustrating almost every player move. Might reduce the workload for you.

Norse Norse Norse!